HOPE

There is one week left. One week cuddling, loving and squeezing this precious boy that we have known for 19 months.

In one week we give him over to wise, trustworthy surgeons who will aid in transforming Owen into a new, healthy 19 month old.

In one week all I will have is HOPE. I am so blessed and have been since before Owen was born by the song Hope Now by Addison Road.

I've attached a link to view the video. I encourage you to close your eyes, and soak in each and every lyric to this beautiful song.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tH6sNNJ4u8o

If everything comes down to love
Then just what am I afraid of
When I call out Your name
Something inside awakes in my soul
How quickly I forget I'm Yours

I'm not my own
I've been carried by You
All my life

Everything rides on hope now
Everything rides on faith somehow
When the world has broken me down
Your love sets me free

When my life is like a storm
Rising waters all I want is the shore
You say I'll be ok and
Make it through the rain
You are my shelter from the storm

I'm not my own
I've been carried by You
All my life

Everything rides on hope now
Everything rides on faith somehow
When the world has broken me down
Your love sets me free

Everything rides on hope now
Everything rides on faith somehow
When the world has broken me down
Your love sets me free
You've become my hearts desire
I will sing Your praises higher
Cause Your love sets me free
Your love sets me free
Your love sets me free

Am I scared? Beyond belief.

I don't want this. My sweet, precious, innocent baby does not deserve a life of sickness, surgeries, needles and medications. I would give anything I could to take his place. I still don't understand. And I likely never will on this side of Heaven. I can't understand why God chose to place this burden and suffering on my baby, but I know it's for His greater good. I know there is a plan far more intricate than I could possibly understand. But the truth is, it still hurts. My heart literally aches in pain for the overwhelming love I have for Owen. I am so grateful that God chose to reveal one of His sweetest, most excellent works in allowing us to raise Owen. However, it is our prayer that next Tuesday will be a glorious day, filled with honor and praise to a King who chose to give Owen a life of purpose and meaning. A life that many "world renown" doctors deemed impossible. A day to praise the God who showed that nothing is impossible for Him. When I question why God didn't just heal Owen, why he didn't choose to spare him this hard life, I am comforted in knowing He is molding us for His work. "Yet when God delays, He is not inactive. This is when He prepares His instruments and matures our strength. Then at the appointed time we will rise up and be equal to our task."

I was both encouraged and challenged in spending time with the Lord when I came across this in my devotional:

 Even though "deep calls to deep" (Ps. 42:7) , the clear cadance of the Lord's song will be heard. And during the most difficult hour that could ever enter a human life, it will be possible to bless the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ. Have you learned this lesson yet? Not simply to endure or to chose God's will, but to rejoice in it with 'inexpressable and glorious joy' (1 Peter 1:8)

That is my prayer for next Tuesday, that during those grueling 8 hours in which my baby lay on table, his life in the hands of skilled surgeons, and me, helpless and waiting on the other other side, that I will choose joy. That during those 8 hours, I'll be a blessing to the One that is not only holding me and keeping me from selfish, fearful weeping, but also holding my sweet boy, safe in His arms. That I will rejoice, knowing that the Lord has chosen to bless me in showing me just how powerful He is, by choosig to trust me with my most precious gift, Owen.

We are so blessed and humbled by the encouragement we have already been receiving in light of his upcoming transplant. We thank you, from the bottom of our hearts for your love and dedication to being in prayer for Owen. It is our prayer that Owen's story will continue to encourage and inspire others, while exalting the King of Kings whose hands has been firmly placed placed over Owen long before conception.

Surgery will begin early Tuesday morning. Carrie will be taken back first, and about an hour or so into her surgery Owen will go back. Once the kidney is removed, Owen's body will already have been prepped and open to receive his new gift of life. The transplant will take around 8 hours. We are still uncertain as to the work that needs to be done to Owen's bladder at this time. We are praying for wisdom, as the doctor will be making his decisions as transplant is taking place.

It's almost hard to even grasp the reality that will be happening in just one week. Each day brings new anticipation, fear, and gratitude. I will never, ever be able to express my heart's thankfulness to Carrie. Because of her selfless love for my son, he will live a new life. Because of her sacrifice, my son will finally feel normal. It's because of her that Owen will live.

I can't praise God enough for the way he has carefully orchestrated and planned my life. From meeting my husband, to creating Owen, knowing from long ago that one of the kidneys he made inside Carrie would be perfect for our son. I'm simply overwhelmed by the power of Christ.

I will be updating facebook and the blog as often as possible. We covet your prayers and are asking that you take time to prayer for Owen, Carrie and our doctors. Pray that the light of Jesus will shine brightly as we wait in anticpation to see a new, healed baby boy, protected by the love of Jesus.

Phillippians 1:6

Being confident of this, that He who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.