The Boys (I love saying that, by the way!) are doing wonderful. I ventured out alone, with both boys for the first time yesterday for their well check up appointments.
Mr. Owen's stats are quite different now that we have a working kidney! Before transplant Owen was "off the charts" for his weight (as in c-h-u-b-b-y!) and barely on the chart for his height (clearly his Mom and Dad aren't giants to begin with!) Well, my now oh-so-healthy two year old is weighing in at 29lbs (51%tile) and 34in (31%). Holy cow! What a difference! So, he's still on the short side, but hey- he's growing like crazy! And slimming down, too....unfortunately I've had to say goodbye to the rolls that made him the cutest "Michelin Man" baby around. :) Owen is doing so many new things lately, I've *almost* had a few breakdowns when coming to the realization that this big brother....really is getting big. He has overcome some huge fears, sensory wise and met some big milestones, all in the few weeks that Abel has been here.
Our first big accomplishment was crawling in the grass. Owen has never, ever, ever been okay with grass touching him. He didn't mind to pick it up with his hands, but was not one to sit, stand or crawl in it. Well, the times of sitting on the patio, knowing Owen will stay right beside us are long gone. He's off and ready to find some dirt and rocks to play with!
Little Brother Abel is growing like wildfire as well!At his 1 month appointment he has jumped up to 11lbs (70%tile) and 22.5in (70%tile). Maybe he's going to fill my need for lovin on those baby rolls! :) Abel is the most easy going, relaxed boy, just like big brother was. I've been given the "okay" to nurse only on demand now, rather than wake him through the night. Most nights, he goes 3-4 hour stretches, eating at 11pm, 2am and 6am. Did I mention he's a great baby?! He' still working on charming big brother to really like him, but I'm sure once Owen realizes we aren't sending him back, he'll come around! :)
So, to tie in the purpose for titling this blog "A New View" (I'm sure you were wondering where I was going with that by now...) I'd like to share a little of what God has been revealing to me during my quiet time with Him. (I had to start with pictures of the boys....I know why you really read!) :)
One of my most favorite verses when waiting for Owen to arrive was 1 Samuel 1:27 "For this child I have prayed, and the Lord has granted me what I asked of Him." I had always longed to be a mother and had prayed for a fruitful womb long before even being married. However, had I read on, and really studied the whole verse, I would have found much more meaning and wisdom for my parenting than I had realized.
If I had read on, I could have learned about the story of Hannah. She prayed for a son. And when the Lord granted her the desires of her heart, she prayed the above verse, in thankfulness to the Lord. However, she didn't stop there. "Therefore I also have lent him to the Lord; as long as he lives he shall be lent to the Lord." (v.28)
I'm still learning how to "lend" my sons to the Lord. As often as I call these sweet boys "mine" they are not. They are His. His precious children, whom He loves immeasurably more than I am capable of doing. They are blessings given to me, to raise in the name of Jesus, worshipping and honoring Him through my parenting. The hands that carefully knit these babies together in my womb are still working in their lives, still growing them, and always, always protecting them.
I am learning to daily lays my boys at the feet of Jesus. To give Him complete control over their lives. My interceding only limits the great things God has planned for them. I cannot parent them alone, without God. This becomes easier when I read this promise: "For He shall give His angels charge over you, to keep you in all your ways. In their hands they shall bear you up, lest you dash your foot against a stone." Psalm 91:11-12
I can admit, I'm a control freak. Especially with all that we have gone through with sweet Owen, I like knowing what's coming, knowing what to expect, and being in control. But I'm not. I don't have control over their lives. The big dreams and desires I have for their lives, must match with the ones created for them by their Creator. This sinful world scares me beyond words. I hate to think of the things children are exposed to at such early ages, losing their innocence so young. I can do what I can in my own house, but leasing them out into the world is a whole different story. It's then when my faith will yet be tested again, in chossing to believe the promises the Lord has said, that He loves His children and will keep them from harm. Wow, this parenting thing isn't easy!
No matter how much of a "helicopter mom" I am, this "mama bear" can't always protect my babies from the wickedness of this world. But, knowing that they are always safe in the arms of Jesus brings a peace in knowing that He's got their backs. I just have to let go a little, and let The One who loves beyond what I can do what He has predestined long before I even prayed for them.
"Hide (them) under the shadow of your wings, from the wicked who oppress (them), from (their) deadly enemies who surround them." Psalm 17:8-9